How To Love Yourself? 10 Simple Steps To Practice Self-Love


Self-Love is a must in order to live a meaningful life. Simply because if you can’t love, nourish and take care of yourself, how would you do all of these to anyone else? Also, how would you pursue the life of your dreams? With this article start following the steps towards self-love journey.


If you want to live a happy life, self-love is a must. Because self-love is the origin of all your actions and patterns. If you want to have self-confidence, first you need to love yourself. If you want to improve yourself, first you need to love yourself. If you want to accomplish your dreams, first you need to love yourself.

I can add lots of things related to self-love. But I don’t want to talk about this now. Because, before talking about other things related to self, first you have to learn how to love yourself. And to be honest, this is not that much easy.

Self-love is hard because generally it is confused with being selfish. most of the times it means to ignore others and only take care of yourself. However, this is not the case.

Self-love requires a hardworking and honest commitment to yourself. But, the benefits of self-love makes it worth trying to love yourself. After starting this process you will see a noticeable improvement in the quality of life that you are living.


10 Simple Steps To Practice Self-Love


So, in this article, I will try to answer the question of how to love yourself. I will give 10 simple steps that you can start to apply to your life easily. Here are 10 self-love tips you can try today to discover how to love yourself.

  1. Start With Self Acceptance
  2. Forgive Yourself
  3. You Are Not Perfect And It Is Okay
  4. Take A Break
  5. You Are Allowed To Make Mistakes
  6. Don’t Take Things Personally
  7. Do What Makes You Happy
  8. Focus On Self-Improvement
  9. Move Away From Toxic People
  10. Make Changes

1-Start With Self Acceptance

The first step to start loving yourself is self-acceptance. You need to know that there is nothing to be ashamed of being who you are, it is okay. There is nothing wrong with that.

People may not like you but, that is okay. Because you don’t need confirmation from the others. The matter of self-love is this. It doesn’t matter what other people think about you. What is important for you is what you think of yourself.

If you are feeling in peace when you are doing something, then it is okay. Go for it. If you are not feeling at peace when you are doing something, then stop it.

The only thing is that don’t let people change your mind. Accept yourself and move along with it.

2-Forgive Yourself

After you accept yourself and who you are, you need to start forgiving yourself by reflecting on your mistakes. Try to explain this to your subconscious mind. No matter what happened in the past, you can forgive yourself. Because the past is past. There is nothing to do about that.

Don’t forget, blaming yourself for the past is not a way to improve self-love. Blaming yourself for some poor choices you may have made will not help you feel happiness and peace in this moment nor in the future.

If you want to love yourself, if you want to improve the relationship with the inner you, forgiving yourself for the past and moving on is a must. It is a great way for your self-worth.

3-You Are Not Perfect And It Is Okay

Don’t be stuck with the idea of perfection. You are not perfect, and you won’t be. And, let me give you a secret. No human will be perfect, ever. This is the nature of humankind. Our imperfections make us beautiful.

Don’t let your flaws take you down. Don’t let them prevent you from loving yourself. When you feel not perfect or not enough, stop yourself and ask this question. Why am I thinking this way? Is it because of the idea that someone else won’t like me? Probably the answer will be yes.

Let me remind you of this. It is not a way to self-love. You need to be grateful for what you have instead of focusing on what you don’t have. You need to accept yourself, forgive yourself, and feel gratitude for it.

It is really easy to fall into the trap of perfection. So I have a quote list as a reminder of the importance of thankfulness. Give it a look at the link below.

10 Quotes About Thankfulness That You Should Keep In Mind

4-Take a Break

Life is hard. Our hands are full from, work, kids, debts… Everything seem like they are against us. Also, each of them is an extra reason to be harsh on ourselves. The thing is when you are not showing love to yourself, dealing with life troubles doesn’t get easier.

So, maybe all you need is taking a break from everything. Nothing is more important than you, and your mental health. Because you can’t love someone else if you don’t love yourself. You can’t take care of others if you don’t take care of yourself.

If you want to be more beneficial to yourself and to your environment, you have to be awaken to this truth.  Take a break when you need instead of pushing. The break can be ten minutes or one week. It doesn’t matter. Take as much as you need. Create time to do this.

If you are thinking that you need support about this, check the link that I shared below. You will find a list of free self-care apps that you can use easily on your phone.

5 Free Self-Care Apps That You Can Use Anytime, Anywhere!

Instead of reading If you want a quick review for those apps, you can check the video below.

5-You Are Allowed To Make Mistakes

When we make mistakes, we often get stuck in the past. We keep asking ourselves, why has this happened? And then we hate ourselves for the mistakes we made. We forget that living in the past is useless.

In such moments, instead of hating yourself and regretting your mistakes, you should try to take lessons from your experiences. You have to ask yourself; what happened, why it happened, what is the experience that I gained from it, and how I can use it for the future.

Long story short, making mistakes and failing is quite normal. Moreover, it will help you if you know how to use the lessons you took from your mistakes.

6-Don’t Take Things Personally

Accepting the idea that it isn’t all about you is one of the keys to a self-love journey. The thing is, taking things not personally, is not that much easy. Because our subconscious mind tends to be negative and to be offended. It always resists being happy. Unfortunately our minds are our biggest enemy in this journey.

Anyways, no matter how hard it is, we need to stop taking things personally. Changing your perspective towards situations is the very first step to do this. You need to push yourself to see the situation from the others’ perspective. You need to ask yourself, is it really about you?

The answer can be yes or no. No matter what the answer is, the second step is to make some empathy. Put yourself in another place. What would you do in this situation if you were that person? Try to understand.

After all, you’ll have a clear view. This will provide you with confidence. With the confidence that you got, you will act in a better way. I mean, instead of taking things personally, you will take your actions according to the situations.

7-Do What Makes You Happy

I know, we have to work to afford our debts. Even if it means that we need to work in a job that we don’t like. But this doesn’t mean that we must stop feeling alive.

If you want to love yourself, you need to separate some time for the things that makes you feel alive.

Funny thing, most of us are not aware of that. I mean, we don’t know what kind of activities make us happy. So, we need to try and find the answer. It doesn’t have to be big or hard activities. It could be anything.

Do you feel happy when you are drinking coffee at home? Do you feel joyful when you are reading a book? Do you feel thankful when you are volunteering? What is it? What are the things that make you happy?

Try and find the answers. And start doing them more. Because the more you do those things, the happier you will be.

8-Focus On Self-Improvement

When I realized that I am feeling alive when I improve myself, I was in the middle of my twenties. I wish I could be aware of the importance of self-improvement a long time ago.  Although it is late, I am thankful that I understood that I need to improve myself to be able to love myself.

In science, they are calling that ego. I know, it sounds horrible. I mean, being a person who has a big ego. But it is not as sound as bad. Because we need that ego if we want to gain some respect for ourselves. Plus, if you can use your ego to help others, you will see it is useful.

The thing is, to be able to have that kind of positive ego, you need to improve yourself. This can be about your hobbies or work, or something else. When you feel that you need to improve yourself, just go after it.

Check out best self improvement habits that will shift your life from here.

Also, because there are thousands of self-improvement books in stores, which makes it really hard to choose one to read. So, I wrote a blog article about that. If you are looking for some help, you can check the article from the link below.

Best 10 Self Improvement Books You Need To Read

Instead of reading If you want a quick review for those books, you can check the video below.

9-Move Away From Toxic People

It is always better to move away from someone who brings you down, than staying with him or her. Because, if for that person it is not important how you feel, it means that he or she doesn’t deserve your love.

Instead of giving your love to that person, love yourself. You don’t need to worry too much about the person who doesn’t worry about you. Surround yourself with people who know your value. Your friends, family members, and partner should give you what you deserve.

It is okay if you have just a few people around you. Focus on how you are feeling when you are with those people and if you need to stop your relationship, make it happen.

10-Make Changes

Change is good. Changing things that you need to change is better. When the whole world is changing, you can’t stay the same. So, when you feel you need to change, make it happen. Even if this means, you have to do things that you’ve never done before.

You can be an old man, who doesn’t know how to use technology. You can be a rule-based person, who doesn’t like to change those rules according to today’s circumstances. If you are feeling good in this way, it is okay.

However, if this affects self-love in a bad way, then you need to change something. So, don’t resist change. Make changes in your life that make you feel alive.


This was just a very shortlist for the answer of how to love yourself. There are plenty of methods that you can try when it comes to self-love. If you have tried one of them before, just share with us your experiences to support others in this adventure!

Furkan Patan

Digital Marketer & Traveller. Blogger @HowToMotivateMe & @OlmeGormeden

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